Designated Doodler

I was subbing at a local school last week and there was this sophomore kid complaining incessantly. He literally WOULD NOT stop talking... "We only get one week for spring break. But it's just enough time to forget everything that teachers expect you to remember. Spring break should be longer. Summer should be longer." My response: Did you know that once you're done with school you'll never get another spring break or summer break again? You'll just work and work and work until you die. Kid: Lesson? Adulting is hard. So take the advice below. Just do what your boss wants. Always keep an eye out for opportunities: Shop responsibly: Exercise regularly: Utilize all of your skills: Schedule your time wisely: Never run away from your responsibilities: Exercise patience at work: Always remain positive: Take care of your belongings/clothes: Be your own biggest supporter: ...

Since I have escaped the profession of copywriter that I spent three years surviving, I thought that I'd reflect back on this job and on the field of advertising as a whole. So please enjoy my analysis of corporate copywriting through this series of James Spader-specific gifs and/or images. Be a copywriter they said, it'll be fun they said. Once upon a time, I proofed a letter and gave it to my boss. He made changes…GIVING IT BACK TO ME WITH MISTAKES THAT HE ADDED…and then proceeded to give me crap about my ability to be an effective copywriter. Prepare to be poor unless you work for some elite, big city agency, in which case, prepare to sign over your entire life for that paycheck. No seriously…you will be in your office at midnight…and at five am the next day. Want a husband? Want kids? Forget it. Your clients will tell your agency that they want you to "be creative," and then they will proceed to give you their (already written ...

1. Hilary and David walk through the homeowners current abode and David highlights how awful, dysfunctional and inadequate it is. He mostly makes the expression pictured below: 2. One person wants to love it, the other wants to list it! What a conundrum! 3. David shows them awful homes. Either they are too far away, or just total crap holes. 4. Hilary runs into "issues" and out of money. She freaks out at Eddie and confronts the couple with the fact that the bedroom/basement/kitchen is now off the list! 5. The unhappy couple slams Hilary and goes outside to talk about what a disaster this all is. 6. Suddenly, David finds a property that doesn't suck like a Hoover vacuum! Inevitably, the couple falls in love. 7. Hilary magically pulls through and creates a beautiful design in the existing home. There is a 35% chance that the couple will utter these words: "we should never have underestimated you Hilary!" 8. David says: "...