Designated Doodler

--> The Idiot This is the person who attempts to get through a yellow light when traffic is stopped/backed up and they end up sitting in the intersection and costing you a green light. The Roid Rager This is the person (usually in a truck) who decides you’re not going fast enough and gets right up on your ass. My response? Go even slower. The Straight Shooter This is the driver who doesn’t look in their rearview to notice your right turn signal and just sits in the right lane waiting for the light, because they are going straight. This usually occurs when you are in a rush and are behind only one car who wants to go straight while you, and the long line behind you, have their right turn signals on. The Nervous Nancy This is the bozo who won’t turn on to the I-10 frontage road until it is nearly COMPLETELY clear of all cars (which is impossible). They have multiple chances to venture onto the highway but must be too scarred from playing too many games o...

Where oh where is my What Not to Wear? Is it here is it there - I can't find it anywhere Should I wear this underwear? If I cut my hair like this Would people stop and stare? I really hate that you're not on the air Because I don't know If this is an acceptable pair Should I dare? Should I dare? Are you there What Not to Wear? Could you get Ted to cut my hair? And Carmindy to fix my skin so fair? Tell me... Does my wardrobe scare? Take me to your secret lair We can watch my footage there. Let's go shopping anywhere! Clinton can pick my clothes While I braid Stacy's hair New York City? I'd go there! SHUT UP! Am I really on the air?

If you are considering joining the advertising field professionally, there are a few things you should know. 1. It's a Highly Competitive Field A lot of people think that they will be able to be super creative and come up with new campaigns all the time. This isn't true 90% of the time. But it's the idea and the excitement that lead a lot of people to this field. I can tell you right now that this field is nothing like what's portrayed on Mad Men. If you're looking for a super sexy career path, consider becoming a Kardashian. 2. You Have to Know Where You Fit There is no "advertising" job. There are many jobs within that umbrella term of "advertising." There are four aspects to advertising: copy, art, client servicing and media buying. Client servicing professionals usually have a background in marketing and are the ones that work closely with the client and the creative team to make sure the ideas stay on track. Media buyers buy space in t...

You have a crystal heart In a carbon cage Ribs of branches And eyes of sage Leaves creak beneath Tepid steps On blistered feet Into the midday That looks more like night A huddled mass of dense gray overhead Chokes out all the light The mumblings of the river bed Seem to speak your name And in this claustrophobic expanse Every landmark looks the same Smell the smoke from somewhere Pulling from the ground and rising in the air It hangs on your lungs like a fur coat Winter. Hunger. And the beginnings of Despair. Keep moving Keep walking Break the ice off frigid limbs Keep hoping Keep talking Through the woods and whipping winds Each breath explodes and falls away Snapped twigs get lost and tramped Dropped items drift with each wind blow And every single boot print you've stamped Disappears beneath the heavy snow

These are some very Pinteresting things that I love. If you're not following me on Pinterest, you're missing out! http://pinterest.com/lizrector/ ...

It is a scientifically proven fact that time slows during the afternoon work hours. The greatest anomaly occurring on Friday afternoons when subjects are inside at work. “There’s just something about Friday’s,” said Doctor Fulloshit. “It’s as if time slows to a crawl, yet the clocks on the wall are keeping normal time. We, at the Institute of Weary Adulthood, have been studying this phenomenon for centuries. And although it hasn’t changed much, the effects are felt much more with the younger generations.” Reputable news source Youngginz interviewed young adults and found that over 99% have at some time experienced, what they have labeled, epically-slow-bored-afternoon, or ESBA for short. And the intensified version of ESBA that occurs on Fridays is called Unbearably-Slow-Friday-Afternoon-Time-Warp, or USFATW. "There's just no getting around it," said Fred Jackson a 20-something graphic designer. "It happens every Friday and to lesser d...

Chocolate eyes Lips that arch like a bow Pulled taught Words ready to go But they're tangled in thoughts Not fit for an arrow PS All works belong to me, Liz Rector and are protected under copyright.

I dislike cucumbers And whole tomatos And those gross little purple things That taste like bitter shoe strings They like to hide under the rich hues of my tossed greens