What Not to Wear
Where oh where
is my What Not to Wear?
Is it here is it there - I can't find it anywhere
Should I wear this underwear?
If I cut my hair like this
Would people stop and stare?
I really hate
that you're not on the air
Because I don't know
If this is an acceptable pair
Should I dare?
Should I dare?
Are you there What Not to Wear?
Could you get Ted to cut my hair?
And Carmindy to fix my skin so fair?
Tell me...
Does my wardrobe scare?
Take me to your secret lair
We can watch my footage there.
Let's go shopping anywhere!
Clinton can pick my clothes
While I braid Stacy's hair
New York City? I'd go there!
SHUT UP! Am I really on the air?
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